We Need To Talk To Our Children About Death Before It Happens “They began to associate someone going ‘bye-bye’ with meaning that they wouldn’t ever be coming back, and separation anxiety kicked in full force.”
one of my main concerns was protecting my kids from as much of it as I could. And in all honesty, I didn’t know how to relay such devastating news to them, knowing it would break their hearts alongside mine. So I did the best I could with what I knew then, and explained it to them in— hopeful that with my soft words, they might catch a break from the full force of it all, even if for just a moment.
When I think back on this day and the immediate ones that followed, I know that they didn’t understand the magnitude of what I was telling them at first. To them, going “bye-bye” meant that you were going to the grocery store or work and would be coming back shortly. But as time moved on, and their sister still hadn’t returned, I noticed them developing problems with this phrase as a direct result of how I chose to use it.
We shouldn’t instill a sense of fear or overall panic into the hearts and minds of our young children, but weguide them in a way that helps them see death as a natural event, not some evil or mystical happening. That even when its appearance is devastating, untimely, and makes us shed a million tears, it’s all so normal.Courtesy of Caila Smith
As heart-wrenching as it may be for us, being candid with our kids by practicing realistic language in the death department is the most impactful way to help them in the long run. There was a time in our history where it wasn’t like this. Where people didn’t feel the need to hide their grief, and the support they received was plentiful. Even still, in other parts of the world, different cultures play an integral role in the final days of those who are dying, as well as those who are newly bereaved.
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