Amanda Kloots Is Dating A Year After Nick Cordero’s Death — Here’s What I’d Say To Her Critics “Until you’ve walked in a widow’s shoes, you do not get a say about how she lives.”
Not one of us who is starting to date loves our late spouse any less. All of us, those who choose to date or not, deserve better than judgment. We’ve been through hell. We’ve judged ourselves more harshly than anyone ever could. What we need is compassion. What Kloots needed when she made her announcement was grace and support.
Kloots responded first in an Instagram story, and then in a longer Instagram Live a few days after. She noted how much judgment widows are subject to when they decide to date — I’d add how much judgment they are subject to when they decide to do anything. She talked about how hard it is to find the courage to date, and how she knows she’ll miss her husband every day, whether she finds new love or not. She shouldn’t have had a comment to respond to, at all.
Loss is loss. When it comes to the death of a loved one, there is no loss that’s easier than another. That being said, the loss of a spouse is a stand-alone kind of loss. It’s a loss that impacts every single thing about your life. The loss of a spouse, especially when you have kids with that person, is very literally life-changing.
Which is why, when a widow finds the courage to date, or finds the courage to live on her own, or finds the courage to do literally anything and she shares that choice, the response should be only this: You are loved and supported.
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