'The benefits are obvious to me.'
When I first announced I was soon having my fifth child, I got a variety of unsolicited advice and commentary, but one question stuck with me like a thorn in my side. “Is that fair to your older kids?” an acquaintance asked.
I never taught my oldest child to help with that task, and it was the only time he got his brother ready that week. But it reassured me completely: Not only is it fair to my older kids to have a role in helping the younger ones, but it’s also a gift for them. It’s something they want to do on their own, and it's incredibly beneficial to their development.
But we aren’t running a business here. There are guardrails in place that seem to make it a pleasant experience to help with siblings, rather than an obligation. This started early on by giving them a choice, in most instances, and a little mama psychology. Instead of “Can you get your brother dressed today? The baby needs my help,” it started with “Hey, your brother loves your style and wants to look just like you for his spirit day.
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