The key to effective praise — the kind that is transformative rather than simply pleasant — is placement.
at Fessenden, a school outside of Boston. Underneath my upbeat exterior, I was a lonely kid, lacking confidence and direction. A budding cynic, I had taken to heart my father’s grim advice: Hope for the best but expect the worst.
I’ll never forget what Coach Fitts said next. “No, Ned, you’re wrong. I think you’re the best player for that position. If I make you play it, maybe you’ll believe it, too.”For a moment, I saw a new me, someone I had always wished to be. Revved up by Coach Fitts’s words, fired up by a determination not to let my teammates down, and psyched up by a new vision of what I could do, I went into the game a new player.
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