Your lying child is not a bad seed. The lying is just another dysfunctional coping mechanism in your child’s ADHD box of unhelpful tools. That doesn't mean you should let it slide, but that does mean you can handle lies differently than you might think.
We were nearing the end of a very long day. My 4 year old clung to my thigh like a monkey to a flagpole, wailing because mommy was going to a PTA meeting after dinner. My 6 year old shouted “Mom, look at my LEGO ship” in machine-gun rapid fire, unsuccessful in attracting my attention because I only had eyes for my 8 year old — the one with attention deficit disorder .
I had absolutely no business buying sand-colored, upholstered chairs, as if I lived in some other house with well-behaved kids and relaxed grown-ups. And, as my eyes fell to the thick black line drawn on the back of my pretty new chair, I realized my daughter had just proven that fact.She shook her head, gripping the marker tight. “No, I didn’t.”Her eyes welled and she began to cry. “I didn’t. I didn’t. I didn’t.
Beginning with the toddler years and waning close to about 10 years old, children are ego-centric, meaning they believe they are the cause of things around them, like whether a rainbow appears or someone is sad. They also believe in pretend and the animation of inanimate objects. They believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. This sense of magical thinking allows a child with ADHD to “wish away” the thing they’d just done. If they say it didn’t happen, then perhaps they can UN-DO it.
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