You don’t want to be a helicopter parent, but you don’t want a problem with a teacher to linger, either. What’s the best move?
By Sue Shellenbarger Sept. 16, 2019 5:30 am ET As millions of young children settle into a new year in elementary school, many parents are wondering nervously: Is the new teacher a good fit?
Riding out a year with a stressful teacher can sometimes help a child learn to deal with challenges. Carol Lloyd was worried when her daughter, Tallulah, was assigned an elementary school teacher several years ago with a reputation for yelling and humiliating students. She decided not to intervene. “You want your kids to be resilient and good problem-solvers, and to know they can survive in difficult situations,” Ms. Lloyd says.
In most cases, Dr. Kennedy-Moore advises against rushing to change a child’s classroom. “Be very careful about removing a child from a situation, because the message you’re giving a child is, ‘This is too hard for you to deal with. You can’t handle it,’ ” Dr. Kennedy-Moore says. “In life, we’re going to have to deal with all kinds of people, and children need to know that.”
And first impressions aren’t always accurate. When Ryan Darcy first met one of his son’s past teachers, she seemed very laid-back. He wasn’t sure she’d be a good fit for his son, who is energetic and eager to learn. He soon realized she was great with students, however, and his son thrived in her class, says Mr. Darcy of Coventry, Conn.
Share Your Thoughts How would you act if your child had a teacher you don’t love? Join the conversation below. Consider acknowledging, “I wasn’t there, so I don’t know exactly what happened, but this is what I heard,” Dr. Kennedy-Moore says. Aim to understand the teacher’s goals and to work together.
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