“Wearing the hijab can make dating harder because people will make assumptions about your sexual experience, what sort of relationship you’re looking for, and even what type of person you are.'
refers to a set of codes that regulate modesty—prohibiting sex before marriage, encouraging conservative dress—for those who practice Islam.about the people who wear it; hijabi women are often seen as brainwashed, repressed, or worse, and they are are seldom portrayed as people who simply want to express their faith. The inaccuracies are frustrating and can make things complicated—especially when it comes to dating.
That doesn’t mean she hasn’t dated. “I was actually engaged to a man who had issues with the way I wore the hijab and was very controlling, so I ended it,” Miriam says. “Women’s bodies are always controlled by men. But the man I am seeing right now is very accepting of my hijab, and things are going very well.”
But the negative stereotypes about the hijab and sex aren’t completely unfounded—just as there are many Muslim women who feel the hijab helps them explore romance and sexuality, there are many who feel it puts them in a box. “I think collectively we should be asking different questions,” Mariam says. “Why do I need to make my body sexually appealing to people? Why can't I just exist in the world like a man and be valued for my mind or my character? And what do we need to change so that more Muslim women feel comfortable speaking about this?”
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