Often, what we think we fear isn't what we actually fear. That's just one aspect of the emotion—and how to respond to it—that many people don't understand. Here are more.
What we think we fear is not what we actually fear.Fear is like a fussy infant. To be pacified, it must be embraced.Recently, I was picked by a committee of students at my university to give a short speech during their baccalaureate ceremony, a traditional gathering of new graduates. The evening's theme had to do with managing, which happens to be my clinical specialty. After the speech, several audience members approached me, commenting that the words resonated.
to important issues. There are times when acting from fear is justified and useful. If you stand in the way of an oncoming train, the alarm bells of fear will compel you to move off the railway—and everybody wins.First, the things we fear most are not the most dangerous to us. We fear snakes and airplanes. We don’t fear chairs and french fries. Yet a sedentary lifestyle and high-cholesterol foods are killing many more of us than snakes and airplane crashes.
Third, running away from—and avoiding—things that scare us will in fact increase, rather than decrease our fear over time. This is because avoidance works like anPeople begin using a substance not to add a problem to their lives, but to solve a problem—to run away from some distress or discomfort. This works in the short term, because using quickly leads to feeling better.
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