Everybody has known it for ages: Optimus is way past his Prime.
The first “Transformers” film in 2007, starring Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox, was frivolous enough; the next four were appalling; and thenTRANSFORMERS: RISE OF THE BEASTSWrong! The fuel gauge is at “E” — for excruciating. The seventh movie in the franchise, “Transformers: Rise of the Beasts,” is a predictable return to rock-em-sock-em stupidity with nothing to add except Michelle Yeoh as a talking aluminum falcon.
As usual, a likable young person is shocked to discover the Porsche he’s sitting in is actually a sentient robot who mysteriously wisecracks and speaks in American slang. Elena and Noah join the Autobots.
The Terrorcons are led by Scourge , who also needs the key to bring back his boss Unicron. That sentence says all you need to know about this bludgeoning of the brain.©Paramount/Courtesy Everett Collection About those underwhelming beasts: We’re introduced to the Maximals, yet more robo-aliens who instead look like a bird, gorilla and cheetah. They’ve been hiding out in the mountains of Peru, director Steven Caple Jr.’s generic movie’s only other location.
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