SexDiaries: 6 p.m. My ex was a poor fit for me beyond the bedroom. We experimented with BDSM and tried out tantra. The sex alone was not enough to keep me fulfilled
Photo-Illustration: James Gallagher This week, a woman texting an old standby and reconnecting with an older man she met on vacation: 30, single, Brooklyn.10 a.m. While starting my day, I receive a random email from J, an older guy I met in England a few months pre-COVID. Back then, I was in a relationship and he was married. He has since divorced and spent the summer settling back in New York. I’m a life coach but also offer private yoga lessons for high-paying clientele.
My ex was a poor fit for me beyond the bedroom. We experimented with BDSM and tried out tantra. The sex alone was not enough to keep me fulfilled; when I eventually started to text other men, a few months after that vacation, I knew it was time to call it quits. We run into each other at concerts and hang from time to time, but I have no interest in engaging further.
6 p.m. Out with some girlfriends for happy hour. I get tipsy and start drunk-texting, looking to hook up. Suddenly, J is top of my list. He doesn’t respond, so I go through my contacts. I don’t hear back from anyone worthwhile, so I text G, who I’ve known since high school; we hooked up one summer when we were still virgins. We reconnected a few years ago and it was fun, but now I only call him if I am really bored. He is the worst fuck buddy I have ever had; he constantly stands me up.
6 p.m. I meet him at the bar and he offers to grab drinks. I appreciate the gesture. I’m 30 and he’s pushing 50, so I enjoy the part of this that feels scandalous. 5:45 p.m. J texts to say he happens to be driving past my house; do I want to meet up? The timing couldn’t be better. I am so ready to get out! I had no time to research, so I suggest a nearby cocktail bar, an old Italian social club he hasn’t been to since he’s been back.
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