Is it time to sever ties to a 'toxic' dad who thought only of himself during mom's time in hospice?
My dad never thought about me, working full time, and spending every night at their house. My aunt was my only relief in those days.I hadn't seen him much the year after that because of the pandemic. We finally met at my aunt's house. I tried talking to him about how he treated me and at first he denied it, but when my aunt backed me up, he said he was grieving and had a good reason for doing that “if he really did.” He made me the bad guy for even bringing it up.
I was crushed and haven’t spoken to him much since then. Is there any reason not to cut my toxic father out of my life entirely?Since I can’t really answer that — only you know of any reasons, in the end, and the greater historical context — I’m going to answer a different question … by asking you one. :You can continue, as you have done, to decide as you go whether there's room in your current moment for a relationship with your dad.
Since you're asking, it sounds as if you're close but not quite there. That's okay, nothing wrong with not being sure, and it's okay not to force yourself to decide once and for all.Therapy might be helpful as you process this. Especially since your brother's behavior suggests there's a family pattern here, of entitled men dumping on the women of the family , and you've spent a lifetime on the wrong end of it.
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