Dear How to Do It: Is there any way I can keep this from happening?
This girl and I began dating not long ago, and recently decided to start having sex. We’re both grown adults , late 20s/early 30s, and it’s neither of our first times. Overall, things feel very compatible! Not just with sexuality but generally—I’m optimistic about how things can go for us. But the reason I’m emailing you is because what I worried would happen actually did during our first-time having sex together: I had a difficult time getting, let alone maintaining, an erection.
I can only think of one or two in the past 10 years where I didn’t have this issue at all; it’s always on my mind when things start going physical, as much as I try not to think about it. I suppose having not had sex in several years is adding to that, too .For better or worse, this HAS made me a bit more attentive and interested in being good at stimulating my partner in other ways like fingers and oral.
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