'My parents met in the Vietnam War, dad couldn't accept that I'm biracial'

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'My parents met in the Vietnam War, dad couldn't accept that I'm biracial'
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'Things got out of hand over there,' my father told me in a rare moment of honesty.

In that silence they tucked away so many memories I wondered if they'd lived their own lives at all. Perhaps forgetting who they once were made it easier for them to accept who they'd ultimately become.

Once in elementary school he was horrified to see that I'd ticked"biracial" on a school census form, and used a pen to—in his words—"correct" my race to Caucasian. Dad had gone to war as a nurse, but we had photos, actual three-by-five photographs, of him holding machine guns instead of syringes, sometimes in a field, sometimes in a jeep, sometimes resting against a wall with ammo strapped across his chest.

My mother carried her own dark memories. When she moved to the U.S. to marry Dad, she left John, then a toddler, with her sisters in Vietnam. She wanted to learn English and assess whether my dad was actually a good man.

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