Dear Care and Feeding: It'll be hard, but it has to be done.
Be honest with your friends about your complicated feelings. Let them know that while part of you would love to have this child for good, that you went into this arrangement knowing it would be temporary because that is what she required. Remind them that this family has done nothing to harm their child and that they deserve to have her back in their care when they are ready to provide for her.
I think “We can’t wish a tragedy on a family because I like putting the baby’s little shoes on her” is a great way to articulate what you are feeling. Be proud of yourself and your husband for taking this noble work on, even if your friends can’t entirely understand why you would do it and not want to keep the baby for good. This is the work of fostering, it’s important, difficult work, and you’ve done a great thing here.
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