I’ve Been Pushed To The Brink By My Husband’s Incessant Snoring Make it stop.
He’s gotten so good at it, why would he quit now? Make it an Olympic sport and he’s bringing home gold in every event in which he competes. The man is all in, all the time.
Remember I said that I am a light sleeper? Well, how about this shit? If I am sleeping and I subconsciously don’t hear him snoring, then I start to have a panic attack. I worry that he is dead in the bed next to me. So what do I do? I grab my phone, turn on the flashlight and shine it on him to see if his chest is moving. If I can’t get a good look at him that way, I’ll move a little closer to see if I can hear a few breaths going in and out.
But when I find out that he’s not dead, I get pissed at him for being quiet and making me worry. Which as I wife, I think is totally justified because no one should have to think that there is a stiff lying next to them at 3am. Once I have finally moved him around enough that the snoring subsides, I will close my eyes and dream sweet dreams. Just when I have gotten to the point where the fortune teller is giving me the sixth and final winning number for this week’s lottery, the string is pulled and the mower starts again.
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