I feel so weird and alone. Is there any hope?
m writing because what is bothering me, not hurt feelings of rejection, is the response from one of my usually supportive friends. Yeah, he was great about if you want to talk about it, etc. However, his comment was it would be a deal breaker for him and his friends, and he thinks thats just how it is over 30? His rationale was he had tons of anonymous sex when he was younger and didnt see himself taking those types of risks unless it was with a person he intends to marry.
I was hoping you would have some advice for how to have a constructive conversation about how stigmatizing this attitude is if this comes up again? Or maybe It think people should do things they arent comfortable with, which is why I explicitly bring this up with my potential partners.
That this vexing conversation you had with him was theoretical makes his words even crueler—without any practical application, they could only serve to make you feel bad and, yes, stigmatized. He has his right to an opinion, as well as to protect himself from pathogens; but just because the thinks something, it doesn’t mean he should say it, especially given your stated sensitivity on the matter. It’s just bad form, and not good-friend behavior.
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