How My Husband Tricked Me Into Caring About the Grateful Dead

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How My Husband Tricked Me Into Caring About the Grateful Dead
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'He likes to ask, in a hopeful voice, what my favorite Dead song is. I cannot tell him because to me they all sound the same.'

Photo: NBC The Cut on Tuesdays A weekly podcast from the Cut and Gimlet Media, with host Molly Fischer.

For example: You don’t know whether the person you fell in love with will turn out to love the Grateful Dead. SAM: Roped her in first and then sprung it on her. My husband, Sam, presented it as a whim: Like, “Maybe I’ll start getting into the Grateful Dead.” This was misdirection. Sam had, in fact, been a latent Deadhead all along. The jam-band impulse lay deep within him, dormant — present and buried since his preteen years.

One of the things you learn about the Grateful Dead, if you or someone you love loves the Grateful Dead: Because they were touring constantly, and people were recording them constantly, there’s an almost limitless supply of material to hear. Which means you can listen to the Grateful Dead all the time and never ever run out.

He really does try. He likes to ask, in a hopeful voice, what my favorite Dead song is. I cannot tell him because to me they all sound the same. I do like hearing him explain what exactly he likes about them … mostly because I enjoy marveling that our brains, which I think of as similar, can be so different in this particular way. That I’m married to someone who is capable of hearing 45 minutes of guitar noodling as a “nonnarrative jam.

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