'I've struggled to believe in a higher power, but I could get behind a philosophy of Judaism that celebrates the strength in all of us'
I was 16, sitting beside my mom at a plastic surgeon’s office in Ottawa and trying to remain calm as the doctor touched my face with plastic gloves. He pointed out all the ways he could make my nose more beautiful: shave down the bridge, cut an incision in my nostrils, lift the tip to make it look more “feminine.”
It was confirmation that my insecurities weren’t just in my head. I really was wearing my religion on my face. I think that’s why, whenever I wanted to tell people I was Jewish, my mom would always say, “Don’t tell anyone. It’s none of their business.” She was trying to protect me; she was scared that telling people meant subjecting myself to the possibility of more anti-Semitism, so it was better not to say anything at all. She never directly experienced this type of prejudice, but I don’t think she had to; intergenerational shame over being Jewish is definitely a thing.
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