Husband 1: Followed another woman to Texas Husband 2: Fought over bills Husband 3: Kept the house Boyfriend: Emptied our joint account Dear Moneyist: How do I trust someone financially again?
I would like to share a story from a woman’s perspective. I have had three marriages and one ex-boyfriend.
The Boyfriend: We starting dating long-distance, we had known each other before. He had an excellent job, talked me into letting him move from Seattle in 2014, so we could build a life together. I agreed. He transferred his job. ‘After New Year, I went to the bank and he had emptied our joint account.’ In 2015, I ended up in the hospital for over a month. When I got home, one day before Christmas, something was strange. He started yelling at me, and the day after Christmas he walked out. After New Year’s, I went to the bank and he had emptied our joint account, save for $1,000. I asked why, and he said I owed him that for my half of the bills.
I have been fighting the debts he left, as he said to the courts he didn’t owe anything since he was a “renter with benefits”, and there was no proof we were going to get married. How do you trust someone after all of this?Oh, boy. Talk about fourth time unlucky. Thank you for your letter and for sharing your story. I’m sorry you had to go through this. Sometimes, the hardest thing to do is walk away from a relationship and all of the Disney dreams that you imagined in those early days.
Don’t miss: Before I give my fiancée a $7,000 diamond engagement ring, I want her to promise to bequeath it to my daughter Here’s the bottom line: If you choose the same kind of person next time, don’t expect a different result. Don’t allow your four previous relationships to prevent you from seeking a fifth, long-term, happy, trustworthy and reliable partner. You deserve a happy relationship. Here’s the good news: You have all the information you will need, if you look for it. I’ve outlined some possible red flags, but what are red flags for you? And, yes, there are always white flags too.
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