There’s drunk shopping, and then there’s Drunk! Shopping! AllisonPDavis writes
A dressing room at Nordstrom. Photo: LANDON NORDEMAN There’s drunk shopping, and there’s Drunk! Shopping! The former is a truly pedestrian experience: tipsily shopping online from bed only to receive, a day or two later, a large mystery package that contains a single electric-toothbrush replacement head. But Drunk! Shopping! is something different. Something beautiful, really. It’s me in the shoe department at the new seven-floor, 320,000-square-foot Nordstrom flagship at 12:03 p.m.
Before I can yell, “This is why we stay home!” and bolt, I’m approached by an employee named John, who, maybe picking up on my crazed energy, gently takes my arm. “The store can be overwhelming,” he says soothingly, as he begins to show me all the ways I can destroy my liver and my credit score in tandem. “Here is ladies’ athleticwear. And over here,” he coos, “is the area where you can buy fine jewelry but also get your ears pierced Thursdays through Sundays.
“But we’re not the fun police,” says Gareth, my new best friend, at the Shoe Bar, where he is giving me the full experience. He recently moved from Seattle to work at the New York store, and though I’m certain the job description didn’t include dealing with an inebriated me, Gareth is all about making this a day. He explains that, while drinking is prohibited in some areas, nobody will “tackle” me should I saunter from level three through level four to level five while holding a drink.
I decide to follow the rule of Legally Blonde: If you’re feeling lonely, find the nearest nail salon. In Beauty Hall , one can, yes, order a drink but also get a blowout or a wax or, as in my case, hold a manicurist hostage while sipping prosecco.
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