Also, his teenage son followed me around town yelling obscenities.
Please warn your readers to stay away from affairs. They demean you, your mate will lose trust in you, and the person you’re having the affair with — can that person ever really be trusted? Won’t he cheat on you, too?Like I said, I used to be nice. I used to care and trust. No more! This man changed not only my entire life but also my family’s. Will I ever forgive myself?FINALLY SAW THE LIGHTLove may be blind, but I’m pleased you finally saw the light.
Abby, I have never felt close to her. We are very different, and neither my husband nor I had any real contact with her other than occasional holiday gatherings. Barbara is a domineering, self-pitying hypochondriac with no friends left she hasn’t alienated. We live fairly near each other, and I have the feeling since the loss of her husband three years ago that she’s expecting me to be her companion and caregiver going into her elder years. I’d slit my wrists first!
I married my husband “until death do us part,” not his family. I don’t want to hurt Barbara’s feelings; I just want to enjoy my own senior years. How can I gently remove myself from her game plan?“Gently” remove yourself from Barbara’s game plan by being increasingly less available. She may be strong-willed and domineering, but you do not have to knuckle under to her wishes or be a dumping ground for her problems.
If she asks to get together, be busy. If she’s depressed, suggest grief counseling, which has helped so many. If she suggests you help her going into her declining years, explain that won’t be possible because you plan to travel. You do not have to be cruel or heavy-handed about standing up for yourself. Just hang on to your sense of humor and keep your distance.
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