DEAR ABBY: I recently reconnected with an old boyfriend after 30 years, and I’m concerned about what I can only describe as co-dependency between him and his daughter. His wife of 20 years died two years ago after a long illness. He was her caregiver for the majority of those years, along with raising his daughter, who is now 21. He has a granddaughter as well, and they all live together.
When I shared with him that I could only imagine how difficult it must have been for everyone and delicately suggested family therapy, he replied, “Everything will be all right in a while.” The majority of our time is spent with his daughter and granddaughter.
Abby, if everything is going to be “all right,” as he believes, why do I feel like I’m filling an empty space with no foreseeable returns in this family dynamic? -- CONFIRMED DIVORCEE FOR NOW Harvey is a dirty, unhygienic man who wipes his chew-covered hands on his jeans and leaves a trail of chew and spittle everywhere. He spits into soda cans and leaves the cans on the end table. One time, my 2-year-old tipped it up and took a swig thinking it was soda!
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