Bob McGrath radiated the warmth and acceptance many young viewers wouldn’t have otherwise received. mattzollerseitz writes
didn’t just entertain and educate young viewers; they also offered an alternative vision of masculinity, one that wasn’t the least bit interested in dominating others, marking territory, or conflating fear with “respect.” Bob was a slender, middle-aged man with a reedy voice. He didn’t look like the sort of person who’d be of much use in a confrontation, yet he radiated a quiet assurance that suggested he could handle whatever came his way. And he didn’t make a big show of being nice.
As a kid growing up in a working-class neighborhood, in a household where drug and alcohol abuse and domestic violence were common and the emotional temperature defaulted between hot and volcanic, I loved watching performers like Bob relate to their Muppet co-stars and the child actors. Here was a world where adult men and women treated one anotherchildren as equals, the latter needing just a bit more care where they lacked self-sufficiency.
Big Bird says that, without Mr. Hooper, Sesame Street “won’t be the same.” Bob responds, “You’re right, Big Bird,” then rises from his chair and walks over to stand by the Muppet’s side. He delivers a brief eulogy that’s a model of sincere, unforced emotion. His voice catches as he speaks, and it feels wholly organic. This is hard for Bob, but he’s pushing through, letting the moment be whatever it’s going to be.
“It will never be the same around here without him,” Bob says, trying to be strong for Big Bird while acknowledging his own pain. “But you know something? We will all be very glad that we had a chance to be with him, and to know him, and to love him a lot when he was here.” It’s one brief moment on a children’s TV series, but the effect is transformational: an adult man giving himself over to grief in the presence of a child without either falling apart or falsely conflating “strength” with the suppression of emotion. It’s a tricky balancing act, and we see Bob managing it imperfectly. The imperfections make the moment indelible and profound. Feelings are real. We all have them. It’s okay to show them, and it’s okay not to know what to do with them.
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