Advice from Amy Dickinson.
One of these friends, “Patrick,” is an alcoholic whose out-of-control behavior during previous ski trips has been difficult for them to tolerate.
I am from a family who has suffered from generations of alcoholism. I have a low tolerance for the pain caused by that sad addiction.However, I am friends with Patrick’s wife, who knows he has been banned from the ski group for his frightening behaviors. Although none of us share her trust in him, she is asking for “understanding” from the ski group and is asking for me to maintain his friendship.We are inclined to gently conclude our relationship with her, but we feel bad for all concerned.Banning an “unruly” person from an already potentially dangerous sporting weekend spent hurtling down a snowy mountain is a logical choice – safest for the group, and for others on the slope.
I take it as a given that, for whatever reason, you want to minimize any contact with the one family member you’ve found who might receive them.
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