90 Day Fiance's Ashley Martson Admits She Still Loves Jay Smith in Tearful Post
"The tears came pouring out. It was the moment I knew... I knew I failed. I failed my marriage, myself, my children. My heart was broken into a million pieces and the walls completely caved in around me. Everything I kept bottled in poured out of my eyes in the back of this Uber," she continued."My best friend, who is a true best friend, didn't even ask. She just began crying as well.
Ashley explained that her BFF knew how"hurt" she had been, which was for quite some time."She saw me hurt for so long and try and act like I was okay even though she knew I wasn't okay. She felt my pain and we both just cried," the reality TV personality shared."The whole ride to our hotel. I never felt a hurt like this in my life. Ever."star reassured her followers that she didn't fault Smith for reaction.
"I'm not blaming all this on him. That's not why I'm posting this. I just want men and women to both know it's okay to not be okay. It's okay to cry it out. It's okay to not be strong all the time. It's okay to fail. Whats not okay is to let it destroy you...," she said."To this day I still hurt. I still love him. I just have come to terms with the fact it's over and I'm gonna be okay.
And while the TLC star still has feelings for her former flame, she expressed that they're truly over for good. "There is no more Ashley and Jay. I'm leaving this post with the final time I speak on us or our marriage," she shared."It's about to be a new year and I'm ready to start a new chapter and not look back."
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