Advice: She feels bad about her “smaller” engagement ring and her materialistic impulses, and wants both distractions to go away.
: “My friends already think my fiance is poor”! Wow. Smaller rock, meet the hard place: your conflicted feelings about status. Even if your friends are hateful snobs, this sounds like your insecurity talking; you gravitate to status-conscious friends, then profess or parade that you’ve chosen humble things. Yes? As in, the rock didn’t reject you; you rejected the rock?It’s a theory. If it has no merit, then this is probably all just bling envy.
If the theory does have merit, then next question: Is bringing a “blue-collar” fiance into your white-collar world another ostentatious rejection of something you secretly value? If so, please make sure you’re smitten with the person, not the statement he makes.My friend and I have been close for years.
I have now realized I am in love with her. I do know she is straight and will never like me like that. But what do I do about it? I feel as if I’m in a no-win situation. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and we spend lots of time with each other, so my hiding things from her is not an option. And because of my feelings for her, I find myself getting mad at her over stupid things, then crying about it.
It’s possible that she won’t respond well, that you can’t win, that you lose your friend either way. But avoiding her altogether, while shielding you from rejection, guarantees you lose the friendship. Admitting your feelings at least gives your friendship a chance.
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