In her new book, 'Essential Labor,' agarbes examines the collective power of mothering and interrogates how individuals can both fight for systemic changes and reclaim acts of mothering in our own lives
Photo: Elizabeth Rudge The actual labor of motherhood takes up far less space in our collective imagination than the static imagery of motherhood. Social media would have us believe that motherhood is free of messy realities. Instead, it’s a nap on a gingham picnic blanket, a stroll through a strawberry patch, a pregnant silhouette at sunset.
This explains why I feel so hungry after reading your work! In Essential Labor, you delineate the difference between our Western cultural preoccupation with idealized maternal identity and the active labor of mothering and care work.
I recently reread Lydia Kiesling’s The Golden State, which is such a fucking good book. And there’s a part where a character does something for her child and she feels this intense grief. Because in that moment, it’s all about the mom and the child and this singular moment in their lives. And it will go away.
There’s the nuclear family, you know, with everyone looking out for No. 1, wanting what’s best for one’s individual family, the privatization of what is good. It’s helpful for me to remember that the ideal of the nuclear family, while very powerful and pervasive, is relatively new in the history of the world.
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